My Voluptuous Vampire


I am married to a voluptuous vampire.

She plays this vampire game on facebook.

When I ask her how she’s doing, she says, ‘my energy is down’, but she is referring to her vampire’s energy, because she is no longer able to distinguish herself from her vampire self.

I ask her where her energy goes, and she says she is kicking some ass.

I pity her victims

but more than that,

I grieve along with their spouses.

We did not marry vampires.

We were not consulted.

This was not included in  our wedding vows.

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