Heartfelt Sense

I wrote the words below back in July 1999. Not sure what I think of them now.

“There is a felt sense in our bodies resulting from the integration of its involuntary responses to what we are seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling, and touching, right here, right now. We have absolutely no control over these responses. The felt sense flows  from the base of our spine to the top of our brain, and back, and around, all the time. I call this spine-mind flow. We may feel the flow intensely in the area of our heart, which lies near the center of the spine. This heartfelt sense is an organ of perception. It perceives the spine-mind flow of other sentient beings, as well as our own, and produces an involuntary response, which we experience as “the heartfelt sense.”  It is unlike other organs in that it fluctuates in form and degree of activity. In other words, unlike the eyeball, which works in spite of our awareness of it, there is not a separation between the conscious experience of the heartfelt sense and its actual practical function. Spine-mind flow becomes impossible not to notice for the evolving consciousness. Our increasing awareness of it activates it, sharpens its perceptive abilities, and grants us knowledge about our intentions, actions, and the link between the two. The link is the spine-mind flow.  Our sense of the world seems to slow down once this organ is activated. We become more patient, even when we are hurrying along. The flow transcends previously known rigid time and space boundaries. We become aware that we know things before we know them in the traditional sense, but we don’t make a big deal about it, and it’s not really describable in words anyway. A decrease in awareness of  flow ‘blinds’ us to the integrated perception of  intention-action, and although we may make assumptions about the actual intention behind any human action, we are basically fumbling around in the dark at the speed of light.  Without the flow, we can’t stand ourselves, so we turn off the light so we don’t have to look in the mirror. With the flow, our ‘ugliness’ is transformed from the magnified mole to the alluring mark on a beautiful woman’s face. The activation of the “heartfelt sense”  makes it possible to better serve ourselves and others. All is cherished, the whole of life, the excruciating pain and exquisite pleasure, the confusion and the certainty.  Spine-mind flow doesn’t benefit us when we give excessive and/or insufficient attention to our primitive sense organ responses before they convert to spine-mind flow. This is logical, as the primitive sense organs are tributaries entering the major flow. This is what gives us a fractured, yucky, limiting sort of feeling about ourselves, something is being left out or becoming distortedly large. Then we focus excessively or insufficiently on that limiting feeling, and the spine-mind flow ceases to benefit us. The river is flowing and we sometimes cling to a rock. In flow, we start to love these little tributaries, these little streams where its fun to fish  even though we don’t always catch anything in the obvious sense. But we won’t over fish them, nor will we give up after just one cast.  Through the heartfelt sense we let go and flow. One cast after another. We miss, we strike, so what. Our seeming imperfections are essential to the perfection of it all. We feel what we feel, and we know that this is needed, this is important – tired, irritable, enraged, or ashamed – it is not diminished.   This is how we can help, by being more fully ourselves, our entire selves, our primitive yet evolving selves.  No aim, no obsession toward resolution – we are just wondering at the wonder of it all. We become amazed at the honesty with which we are living our lives. Even our apologies are not weighed down by guilt. The “heartfelt sense” is the organ of wonder, compassion, non-judgement, detachment, immersion, satiation, praise. We have no control over this. We have given up. We accept the Gift, It is Us. Love, the only act of a lifetime that makes any sense …heartfelt sense.”


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