May 3, 2016
Most of us have heard the saying, “What fires together, wires together.” A lot of it is not helpful. Without flexibility of attention, our old wiring will be our destiny.
So how so we work with it? We want to have an experience of something helpful. The intenton to be helpful to oneself or others is compassion. It is developed by paying attention without judgement or striving to whatever is happening.
Just sit and allow whatever comes up to come up.
You will feel some things you do not like.
Instead of feeling bad about feeling bad, let the suffering be an opprtunity to practice compassion.
See what it is like to slow things down, allow whatever is happening to happen. Stop trying or doing. This is not about getting something right.
Notice what happens. Then notice what happens next. What is possible now? Allow playfulness. Allow compassion. Allow confidence.
Nothing changes unless you feel safe, safe to make mistakes, to bring attention to them, to live with them. The process gives greater equanimity and balance. Give yourself permission to not know.
You can live well with things you don’t like. You don’t have to be a victim. You are not a child.
“Letting it all be” doesn’t mean you stop efforts to improve your situation or your mindset.
The strain in pain lies mainly in the brain.
January 18, 2016
….a lot of people will run from you when you are in pain, or dismiss it. This causes people to be susceptible to manipulation by people who have an agenda and feign interest in your pain. So that’s a painful thought, but good people recognize pain too, in fact, it is a requirement for compassion which is generally expected from people we consider good.
The quote in the title comes from material by the late Jim Camp, a very successful negotation coach.
January 18, 2016
…. but that doesn’t mean it excludes the potential for rightness. It allows you to pay proper attention to the context – time, place, people.
December 24, 2015
No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God lives in us, and his love is perfected in us.
June 24, 2015
Before you can decide on something, you must be able to visualize it some detail. Being indecisive is painful, so we want to get out of that pain. The problem for many of this is that we don’t have the tools or mindset to discover the real details to complete the vision, so we fill them in from our past experience or ‘good judgement’ so we can make a decision and feel better.
Patience is key, as is a willingness to embark on discovery. At some level you need to simply be curious. Nurture your own curiosity, and be steadfast with it even in the presence of the curiosity killer – fear.
Fear is almost inevitable if you are just waiting around in the dark and not doing the work of discovery.
Make the decision to discover.
Ask questions. Observe. Take notes so you don’t forget!
Doing so will soothe your fear, and move you toward your best decisions possible.
Getting it wrong is just another discovery on the way to getting it right.
June 21, 2015
A lot to digest here, so take in each sentence slowly. One a day is probably best:
-If we expect things or need things to be perfect or even ‘to our liking’ , we have created a certain plan for a very unhappy life.
-We don’t come to God by eliminating our imperfection, but by rejoicing in it because it makes us aware of our need for God’s mercy and love and it keeps us humble.
-The spirituality of poverty is the recognition that myself, by itself, is powerless and ineffective.
-Within the spirituality of imperfection, the quickest ticket to enlightenment is calmly acknowledged littleness. Then you have nothing to prove, protect, or promote. The ego resists , but the soul knows.
– You can show your love to others by not wishing they should be better.
-We must bear patiently not being good….and not being thought good.
St Francis of Assisi
-Patience is being patient with your patience.
Let go of the need to think well of yourself and your situation.
Let go of the need for peace, over and over, and a deeper and broader peace than you can imagine will come to possess you.